We step into the office where \\
The boss sits in an office chair\\
A hundred times a millionaire\\
Swivelling in his underwear\\
And on the lap of luxury\\
Sits some girl from the factory\\
Presented as a Christmas gift\\
They did the business in the lift\\
\\
With his trousers round his ankles\\
And his fingers in the till\\
Everybody loves a scandal\\
And it helps to pay the bills \\
\\
From the ashes of disaster grow\\
The roses of success and so \\
There beneath the mistletoe\\
They caught it all on video\\
And I thought I saw a princess begging\\
From the windows of a Double Decker\\
We all love a royal wedding\\
But a royal divorce is better\\
\\
With their trousers round their ankles\\
And their fingers in the till\\
everybody loves a scandal\\
And it helps to pay the bills\\
It's easy \\
\\
They say , \\
If you put a monkey behind a typewriter\\
For about a million years\\
He'll write the complete works of William Shakespeare \\
And then he'll tell you a tale\\
Of how his love affair failed\\
With The Princess Of Wales\\
And the Americans will turn it into a mini series\\
\\
With their trousers round their ankles\\
And their fingers in the till\\
Everybody loves a scandal\\
And it helps to pay the bills\\
It's easy \\
As D.I.V.O.R.C.E.F.G.\\